At the end of the show Sean Collier made an interesting point about how the minute differences between the various denominations seem to overwhelm any notion of the similarities between denominations. I think I have that right. Sean, if you're reading this and I got it wrong, drop me a line and I'll fix it.
On the way I badly mangled a great Emo Philipps joke. For the sake of comedy karma, here's the joke - from the master himself:
Once I saw this guy on a bridge about to jump.As proper comedy penance I present one more Emo religion joke fer y'inz:
I said, "Don't do it!"
He said, "Nobody loves me."
I said, "God loves you. Do you believe in God?"
He said, "Yes."
I said, "Are you a Christian or a Jew?"
He said, "A Christian."
I said, "Me, too! Protestant or Catholic?"
He said, "Protestant."
I said, "Me, too! What franchise?"
He said, "Baptist."
I said, "Me, too! Northern Baptist or Southern Baptist?"
He said, "Northern Baptist."
I said, "Me, too! Northern Conservative Baptist or Northern Liberal Baptist?"
He said, "Northern Conservative Baptist."
I said, "Me, too! Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region, or Northern Conservative Baptist Eastern Region?"
He said, "Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region."
I said, "Me, too! Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1879, or Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1912?"
He said, "Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1912."
I said, "Die, heretic!" And I pushed him over.
When I was a kid, I used to pray every night for a new bike. Then I realised, the Lord doesn't work that way. So I just stole one and asked Him to forgive me ... and I got it!I pray the comedy gods forgive me for so badly mangling The Word of The Emo.
2 comments:
Here's one you could have told...
Obama dies and finds himself before the Pearly Gates.
He is very excited; all his life he's had a secret wish and longed to meet the Prophet Mohammed.
Having arrived at the Gates of Heaven, Barack meets a man with a beard.
"Are you Mohammed?" he asks.
"No, my son. I am Peter. Mohammed is higher up." Peter then points to a ladder that rises into the clouds.
Delighted that Mohammed should be higher than Peter, Obama climbs the ladder in great strides.
He climbs through the clouds coming to a room where he meets another bearded man.
He asks again, "Are you Mohammed?"
"No, I am Moses. Mohammed is up higher."
Exhausted, but with a heart full of joy he climbs the ladder yet again.
He discovers an even larger room where he meets another man with a beard.
Full of hope, he asks again, "Are you Mohammed?"
"No, I am Jesus... You will find Mohammed higher up."
Mohammed higher than Jesus! Man! Obama can hardly contain his delight and climbs and climbs, ever higher.
Once again, he reaches a larger room where he meets a man with a beard and repeats his question: "Are You Mohammed?" he gasps as he is, by now, totally out of breath from all his climbing.
"No, my son... I am God Almighty. But you look exhausted. Would you like a something to drink?"
"Yes! Please, my Lord", replies Obama. God looks behind him, claps his hands and yells out: "Hey Mohammed-- two ice teas!"
He could have told that, but why? Jokes are meant to be funny.
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